I hired a dual-control car from Arnold Clark in Paisley yesterday, accompanied by the very kind Michael as my "responsible, grown-up person with a real driving licence". Although the Byzantine traffic systems of Paisley probably hold few fears for a man who has driven through Athens at rush hour.
This is just as well, as immediately after leaving the hire-place I turned left instead of right and set us on a - seemingly inexorable - path towards either the dual carriageway to Greenock, or the motorway to Glasgow. Neither of which we fancied. However we managed to extricate ourselves by means of a tiny roundabout at the end of a side road that seemed to have been put there for that very purpose. Handy.
As we headed back towards the town centre, I worried that I couldn't remember what key I was in. After being informed that I was probably driving in C# minor (and definitely in third gear) things were going quite well until I did the whole left instead of right thing again and ended up heading towards Barrhead. I don't like Barrhead. It's difficult and involves something called "The Hurlet" which sounds alarming before you even get to it.
Luckily, by dint of actually executing a right turn for a change, Barrhead was successfully averted, and were were able to carry on getting lost for a bit before I managed to get us back on time by way of a three-point turn. And there are still a couple of strands of Michael's hair the same colour as when we started...;-)